Dataphor - TITS vs. FITS

Catchy title, huh:)
Ok, one more metaphor before we get down to the nitty gritty.

Dataphor is what I call a TITS:
a Tight Information Technology System 

Tight as in reasoned and concise. Tight as in having full control
over the things it manipulates.  Tight as in logic and mathematics
where there exists no ambiguities. Tight as in algebra where one
thing can be inferred from another.

Sql is what I call a FITS:
a Funky Information Technology System

Funky as in something that functions, but in a slightly strange,
klugey way. Funky as in it does the job and would be difficult to
change, so its obvious non-optimality is left alone. As in the
more bugs something has that nobody has bothered to fix because
workarounds are easier, the funkier it is.

All the loose ends, ambiguities and redundancies of sql are
over come in dataphor. All the twilight of sql becomes clarified
in dataphor. All the gotcha's in sql become tight in dataphor.

I believe you can teach old dogs new tricks.
And I hope I can turn a funky programmer into a tight one.
So if you're tired of throwing sql fits meet a great system
based on TITS.